Saturday, January 2, 2010

"Not Even Slightly Impressed"

My New Years Resolution: Drink & Don't Let Anyone Ruin Your Good Time. And it was hella chill, btw. I had a great time, and for the week leading up to last night, I haven't eaten a thing - and this morning when I weighed in, I was down at least 4 pounds. Thank the lord. I wasn't thinking, "Oh I won't lose anything." Because I knew I would, especially considering the fact I over-drank night before last and threw up any and everything I had had to drink…
I'm way proud of myself. I didn't sleep around with anyone while I was at the party New Year's. I almost did, supposedly but I was not even slightly impressed by anyone there. Sure, I kissed a bunch of guys when midnight came around, just because everyone was going around in a circle and thought it funny, but I didn't find anyone I was super into. Which, isn't much of a shock considering I don't know what I want in a guy anymore.
I've been feeling sick as hell lately. I mean, I can't eat - and although that's a great thing for me - I miss when I have the choice to eat and I choose not to, at the moment I have no choice and I feel like it's my body trying to tell me something. It's not the best feeling in the world, but I'll deal. I just hate being sick.
I'm considering doing some New Year's clothes shopping today - but I don't know if I'm really in the mood right now. I mean, other than feeling sick, I'm still hung over, and I got way high night before last and last night, so I'm feeling kind of sick in that way too. No lies, it was completely worth it, but still.
Now, I've decided I need another New Years Resolution that doesn't have anything to do with the one I've already achieved. Maybe I should Resolve to become more engrossed in Ana? But see, that idea, while it's commendable, isn't for me. I could Resolve to try be a nicer person, maybe focus on making new friends? But see, that idea, which commendable, is stupid considering how much I don't like the people I'm already friends with or anyone else from my hell hole of a school. See - I'm just having too much trouble figuring this out, which is probably why I can never keep up with my Resolutions. It's like my friend said New Years Night : "Life's temporary; like New Years Resolutions." She's a prophet. Ha. (:
And now, considering the fact that I've lost almost my normal 2 day weight loss in under 2 days, I think I may be able to relax today. I mean, I want to go shopping, just grab some non-descript shirts and sweaters, and then maybe I'll hit my gym this afternoon, who knows. It seems like my newer posts are much shorter than the original ones, but when I have more time, I'll make it up to everyone.

Wish my luck kids. <3

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